I have wanted to write about this for a long time. But, be it guilt, procrastination, or complete lack of motivation I feel like now is as good a time as ever.
I want to talk about technology, smart phones being the heavy offender here. And maybe it isn’t just the smart phone itself but the access that it gives us to things like social media, the news, and every little thing our mind can think of to Google.
Let’s start with the mass amounts of information available on the internet. Being pregnant with my first baby, I’m going to be a first time parent, and obviously I can’t help but wonder about lots of things. When I have a headache I might look up if it is something to be concerned about, my tailbone pain that I have been dealing with for the last three weeks is researched thoroughly, and whether or not it is safe or not for me to continue sleeping on my back after 20 weeks. It is easy to see how my mind can run away with all of the little things that I could worry about, and having information available to me can either cause me to worry less or worry more. Often times it leads to me worrying more. My husband tells me, “you read too much”. What he means is that I allow my mind to become garbled in the information, I can no longer focus on simple things and tasks. It’s a reminder that parenting is in our blood, that worrying about every little detail will not help but could actually hurt me more.
But, how do I break the habit? Is it as simple as just not researching things? No, because it is a bad habit, and bad habits die hard. I wish that I had more self control. That I could make myself not look at my phone or iPad when I want the answer to a question, but I can’t seem to do that. In an attempt to pull myself away from the madness that can overtake me I have moved my phone out of the bedroom. This is no easy task. My phone is my alarm clock. I have a traditional analog clock that has a beeping alarm function, but this clock does not have a snooze button, just an off. My hope is that not relying on the snooze will help me to get up and start my day better. My phone will not be scrolled through when I awake in the morning. I can actually read something else that is on a physical page, not my phone screen.
This is just one small step. Although I don’t plan on deleting my social media accounts, I am going to make a concerted effort to spend less time on them. And if I can’t do that, perhaps I will install one of those parental apps on my phone that keeps me from using those apps for more than 30 minutes total each day.
All of this with the purpose of simply being more present in the real life. When our noses are dug into our phones we don’t notice the things around us. We miss out on important conversations and opportunities to better ourselves. I would like to set an example for my child that time means something.
So, I’m going to set down my time wasters, my phone and iPad. Maybe when I want to “read” something I will just pick up a book, and when I say that I mean one that is not chock full of “useless” information that will make me worry more.